Agenda Broken

Can I justify this by saying I'm doing "research"? Well, I'm taking notes even as I'm scattered into 1 to the 6th pieces. Where do Holmes and Freud fit in? There are other things than this slow demolition of soul, but... Hippie tea will sooth - a proven method.

"Moments like these never last." Jenn linked me to that with her voice.

There are other things than guilt. I can say that... now. I can recognize. I can pay and repay - cash cheques. I wish I could forget, but I will by necessity, at some point. I'm caring and kind, I think, but I'm selfish, often, and still an addict, relapsing on average once a week - and the fellowship still welcomes me. I may find spirituality yet, somehow, anything can happen. It's funny, I know now that I need to be tied down. I know how to do something... cash cheques. Keep coming back, it works when you work it. In N.Y. they add, "so work it, you're worth it!" It would get boring if we always said the same thing everywhere.

Agenda broken. Crossed through to the other side. Can't imagine crossing the sleep divide. I've paid penance, pre-emptively, with two extra hard but okay days of work. That's why they call them shamb warriors. I'd like to do this, I'd like to do that, but -- myriad pyramid alternating - stillborn spotty purpose, mallwallet. This means something, but meaning means nothing - switch gears? It's just one in a hundred.